Good Bye Forever.

There is so much to say.
I don't blame you.
I know you don't understand.
It's my fault.
I've changed you, I've made you miserable.
For that, I hope you forgive me.
I want you to always be happy.
But maybe this was all my own illusion?
She has made it clear that we were never close.
We were not even good friends.
I don't know if you lied, just to be nice.
But from recent events, I believe you have.
You are a wonderful person.
You lied to save my life.
For that, I owe you my life.
But no I will not do that to you.
My presence tortures you.
I am keeping you from greatness.
I guess, I showered you with too much emotion and love.
I wish I never opened to you.
I am broken when, I am open.
As much as I was cautious to never suffocate you with my emotions, I believe I have.
I think now and laugh.
If you knew me as others do, I think we would never had anything.
All I want for you, is to be happy.
This pain in the back of my throat, this blurriness of vision, is all too familiar.
So for you to be happy and free, I now sever our bond.
Perhaps we were never meant to be.
Be free and live happily.
In this world of darkness, I thought you were my light.
In this world of madness, I thought you were my sanity.
In this world of imbalance, I thought you were my balance.
I looked to you to keep me sane, but now I am only deeper into insanity.
I hoped you would be my Virgil and Beatrice.
I prayed you would lead me out of Hell
I prayed you would lead me through Purgatory.
I dreamed of us entering Paradise together.
But no, I face Hell alone.
I face Repentance alone.
And I enter Paradise alone.
Again my throat throbs with pain.
Breathing hurts.
But my most of all my chest.
I hope you forget about me.
Because I know I can never forget you.
I keep your photograph, because I know it serves me well.
I wish I could steal away the pain, that I've given you.
I know you pushed me away.
Pushed me away and I have fallen.
I will always remember your smile and your words.
They will always cut me.
There is so much more I wish I could say, but I will refrain.
I hope you never read this.
I hope you never remember me.
Good bye forever, my love.